It's raining, so why not?
The rains have finally come crashing down on the flower fields and I am so excited about it. My flowers were starting to look like they all belonged in a fairy garden and my rein as the worlds worst flower farmer was starting to hold some truth.
Honestly though, I feel like I should be on here boasting about what an amazing summer it has been so far, but then it honestly feels a little awkward for me to be feeling good at where I am in my business and my life. To feel content with coming to terms with the fact that I will most likely never have a crazy boasting flower farm like my pal Katie, or that my designs won't be as high end as my girl Jenny or that Ben will most likely never be as passionate about farming as Jed is with Jamie, or that my zest for life doesn't hold a candle to the heart and soul that is Allison. This is why I cherish these 4 women as they have made me see in myself things that weren't there before. That instead of feeling insecure about my short comings, I can embrace the fact that I can grow a mean rose and bring some humor to the life of flowers and all that comes with it.
When I started this journey several years ago I was alone. I had absolutely no idea what the hell I was doing, where I was going or who to even contact. I legit thought that I created this idea. The idea of growing flowers and then using what I grew in designs while also foraging our woods and using all that mother nature provides. Ha, I look back now and wish I still had bits and pieces of that naive girl in me. Before the comparison of social media wreaks havoc on your soul. Before you start to second guess every little thing you do because so and so does it this way and look at their shit grow!
I made the decision like 2 days ago, wait maybe it was 2 weeks ago. It isn't relevant when I had this epiphany, but I had one so that is pretty cool in its self. You are all at the edge of your seat wondering what it is I am sure, but really it isn't that cool so don't get too excited.
Anyways, I have decided that this woman is going to go back to enjoying her days of growing flowers that she loves, the perennial. Yes, I will still have my sunflowers, dahlias, lisianthus and a couple other of my staple annuals, but I miss having Iris in the fields. I miss the scent of hyacinths in the spring and the fact that I know where I planted it and when it will be in bloom.
See the best part of all of this is that I have these 4 beautiful friends who grow some of the most killer flowers, and who know how to properly grow them so that they have enough to sell to people like me. Ones who for some reason have always struggled with growing damn annuals. I am forever grateful for their love and support as well as the added push I sometimes need when I become a Debbie Downer.
Me, Allison (FlowerSmith Farm), Katie (Flower Fields Forever), Jenny (Flowerwell) & Jamie (Jayflora)
Maybe this all seems a bit much that I am writing a "thank you" blog about these ladies, but I think sometimes as a person telling the ones that fill your cup up that they do, means more than you or they know. Sometimes the overwhelming fears that are being a good woman, mother, business owner, wife, friend, daughter and just a decent person on this planet can get overwhelming. We need to cherish the ones that makes us not feel like a pile of worthless crap instead of investing our time and energy into the things that start to suck the happiness out of us.
I didn't mean to get all inspirational on ya there, just sometimes start to get caught up in my emotions when I write. But, now that emotion has started to slip as Ben is sitting across from me asking me 100 questions about bills and random shit that now all I can think of is that trowing pencils at annoying spouses is something you should not do. 12 years we have been together and being spoken to about anything other than "do you want some coffee" before I have had that said cup, is grounds for me pouring you the leftover coffee from yesterday. The one that is cold, musky and taste like Bert's breathe after he eats chicken poop. Marriage, just summed that up in a hot minute.
Anyways. Cheers to be growing perennials next year, and still being married after 12 years.
I legit can't even think how to end this blog now, so this is my ending paragraph...this right here!
Photos by Belle Idee Photography